Phantoms of Stars

Rooftop. Anthony is sitting on the rooftop in Jessie’s spot. Jessie begins to crawl out of the window and sees Anthony there.

JESSIE
What are you doing out here?

ANTHONY
Same thing you usually do, I imagine.

A moment. JESSIE decides to come out onto the roof.

JESSIE
You’ve seen me?

ANTHONY
I’ve heard you pass by my room and then creak the window open and crawl out of it.

JESSIE
I hate that creak.

ANTHONY
That’s too bad. It’s got a really nice pitch…

beat

JESSIE
I’ve been coming out here since I was little. I didn’t think anyone else knew about it.

ANTHONY
It’s not really that secret.

JESSIE
No, but… it’s always felt like a secret.

ANTHONY
And here I am in your secret spot. That must be weird for you.

JESSIE
No… it’s a little strange. But it’s not like I own it.

ANTHONY
Well, thanks for sharing.

He takes out a pack of cloves and puts a cigarette in his mouth. He offers JESSIE one when he sees her staring at him. She shakes her head.

JESSIE
I didn’t know you smoked.

ANTHONY
Every once in a while.

JESSIE
You probably shouldn’t here … I mean, my dad might catch you.

ANTHONY
And?

JESSIE
He hates smoking.

ANTHONY
That’s his business.

JESSIE
Unless you’re in his house…

ANTHONY
This isn’t technically the house. It’s the roof. This also isn’t technically a cigarette. It’s a clove. And, I’m over 18 so it’s not illegal. Which is about the stupidest law anyhow. We can drive a car, the thing that kills more people and pollutes the Earth worse than anything else before we can smoke something that grows naturally in the ground and that Natives have been smoking for centuries…Totally bogus. But what isn’t? Anyways, your dad isn’t my dad so it doesn’t really matter what he thinks about what I do.

JESSIE
He might tell your mom.

ANTHONY
She smokes them too.

JESSIE
She does?

ANTHONY
Every once in a while. But don’t tell your dad. Everybody needs something secret. (he starts to light the cigarette, but looks over at JESSIE). Is this making you uncomfortable?

JESSIE
Um… kind of….

ANTHONY
Only kind of? Okay then… starts to light it again.

JESSIE
Um… more than kind of.

ANTHONY
How much then?

JESSIE
I don’t know. Really?

ANTHONY
Really uncomfortable? Man. Then I guess I won’t do it. Wouldn’t want to offend you while I’m sitting in your spot. That’d be like a double insult, wouldn’t it?

JESSIE
I don’t know, but thanks…

Beat. Anthony drums the tar half-heartedly.

JESSIE
Do you hate it here?

ANTHONY
No. Why?

JESSIE
Sometimes it really seems like you do.

ANTHONY
Like now, you mean?

JESSIE
Yeah.

ANTHONY
I’m just drummin.

JESSIE
Yeah, but you’ve got this look like you wish you were back in Vancouver or really, anywhere else but here.

ANTHONY
Vancouver was cool enough. But it doesn’t really matter where I am. Things are always pretty much the same.

JESSIE
What do you mean?

ANTHONY
Everywhere, everything… it’s all the same, more or less. There are cool people and ugly people and people who don’t offer a thing to the world but use up as many of its resources as they possibly can. And all of these people do the same things or versions of them for work or for fun and so it doesn’t really matter where you go. Every place is essentially the same as every other place, they just have different names.

JESSIE
What about China?

ANTHONY
What about it? The people are shorter and they speak a different language and read from top to bottom instead of left to right but they still go to school everyday or to offices and sit in front of computers or desks and then come home and eat dinner and drink Coke or beer and then watch TV or listen to cheesy pop songs, probably awful American ones, until they fall asleep and try to forget that they just spent another day of their life almost exactly like the last one and that tomorrow’s probably not going to be any different.

JESSIE
Unless there’s a tsunami.

ANTHONY
That was Sri Lanka. And India. And Indonesia. And Malaysia.

JESSIE
I know.

ANTHONY
Really? Cuz there were several countries that were hit and China wasn’t one of them.

JESSIE
I said I know. My point was only that there are some things that might make a difference in people’s boring lives.

ANTHONY
Sure, natural disasters make a difference.

JESSIE
Maybe smaller things too.

ANTHONY
Such as?

JESSIE
Such as… I don’t know. Two people who see each other every day but don’t really know a thing about each other – one day they actually have a conversation… that could make a difference.

ANTHONY
Like right now? I didn’t realize this was so monumental.

JESSIE
I wasn’t referring to us.

ANTHONY
Alright… then I think it depends on what the people say to each other. I mean they could just say – Did you clean the bathroom? Or, have you seen my keys? Or, nice weather we’re having.

JESSIE
Actually, that might even make a difference. I mean, what if one of the people was going to kill themselves? Any little word from anyone might end up saving them.

ANTHONY
Even if it was: Did you clean the bathroom?

JESSIE
Sure. I mean, what if the person didn’t clean the bathroom and so now they have to do it before they can commit suicide and in the few minutes that they’re scrubbing the toilet or whatever, they realize that they’ve never said more than a few words to the other person and that maybe they should give that person a chance to prove themselves as a human being… or something. And maybe this is all the motivation they need to keep on living. At least for one more day. And who’s to say what little thing might happen the next day…

ANTHONY
You’re not thinking of killing yourself or anything, are you?

JESSIE
I don’t have to relate everything to myself, do I?

ANTHONY
No. But with something so huge, I’d hate to wonder later on.

JESSIE
A boy in my grade just did. Last week. He took a bunch of pills. I always meant to say hi to him. I smiled every once in a while, but I don’t think he noticed.

ANTHONY
You think you could have saved him?

JESSIE
I don’t know. I didn’t even know he needed saving. But I could have been friendly, human. He looked like he could have used some friends.

ANTHONY
Everyone can use friends. People who will talk to them about more universal things than bathroom cleaning. Things like tsunamis, for instance.

JESSIE
Do we have to revisit that?

ANTHONY
Not if you’ve got something better.

JESSIE
Stars.

ANTHONY
Oh really? What about them?

JESSIE
I don’t know. They’re right there. Just above us. Bright as ever.

They look at the stars for a while.

ANTHONY
I’ve been trying to write a song about them.

JESSIE
Yeah?

ANTHONY
Yeah. But it’s not going so well. It sounds like every other acoustic guitar song about stars.

JESSIE
Are there a lot of them?

ANTHONY
“Yellow”?

JESSIE
Oh that’s a good one.

ANTHONY
“Vein of Stars” by the Flaming Lips is even better. Then there’s the band Stars and Wilco’s song “Jesus Etc.” with the lyrics “every star is a shining sun.” And of course there’s the whole slew of kiddie songs including the kingdaddy of them all,“Twinkle, twinkle.” Am I boring you yet?

JESSIE
I get the point.

ANTHONY
There are tons. Probably as many as there are stars.

JESSIE
70 sextillion?

ANTHONY
What the hell is that?

JESSIE
How many stars there are. In the known universe, at least.

ANTHONY
Sextillion?

JESSIE
I know.

ANTHONY
What’s a sextillion?

JESSIE
A lot. Way more than the all the songs ever written. More than all the grains of sand on the entire world, according to--

ANTHONY
--Wait a minute. Million, billion, trillion…

JESSIE
…Quadrillion… quintillion? (I think)... Sextillion?

ANTHONY
So six becomes sex if you add enough zeros?

JESSIE
Guess mathematicians get horny too… (ANTHONY looks at her surprised.) What?

They both laugh.
ANTHONY
How come I never knew how cool you are?

JESSIE
Maybe because you’re always in your room with the door closed.

ANTHONY
It’s never locked. You could come in, if you wanted.

JESSIE
Right.

ANTHONY
What? Is that so weird? We’re siblings, aren’t we?

JESSIE
Step-siblings and we’re pretty much strangers. And you’re way older than me. And you’re a boy. And you’re always playing your guitar.

ANTHONY
Got to make music.

JESSIE
Is that what you want to be… a musician?

ANTHONY
That’s what I am.

JESSIE
I mean, when you get older. For a career or whatever.

ANTHONY
What exactly is a career these day? Do you know? Cause I don’t.

JESSIE
Um, a job? That you do for a long time?

ANTHONY
I don’t want to do anything for a really long time except make music.

JESSIE
Don’t you think about the future though? About how you’re going to make money? Money’s kind of important when it comes to feeding yourself and all that. I mean you can’t exactly stay in this house forever.

ANTHONY
Nor would I want to.

JESSIE
I didn’t mean--

ANTHONY
-- I hear music constantly. I hear it right now. Under all of your words. Sometimes in your words… your voice hits higher notes when you’re nervous…

JESSIE
I’m not nervous.

ANTHONY
…I hear it when I’m walking to the store, when I’m eating breakfast, when I’m in the bathroom… I even dream music. And none of what I hear has anything to do with what’s going to bring me money… I think if it did, I’d become like every other stupid selfish songwriter, making music about the pettiest little personal things – crushes or breakups or broken pick-up trucks…

JESSIE
Or stars?

ANTHONY
Stars aren’t exactly petty or personal.

JESSIE
No, but every other “stupid selfish songwriter” is writing about them…

ANTHONY
My song’s going to be different. It’s not going to be about myself in relation to them and it’s not going to use them as a metaphor for the things that go on in my own tiny bubble. Not when there’s so, so, so much more to explore. I mean… look up there…

JESSIE
Yep… sextillion balls of burning gas.

ANTHONY
How’d you know that, anyway?

JESSIE
That there are sextillion of them? I Googled it.

ANTHONY
You just typed in “how many stars in the universe” or something?

JESSIE
Yep.

ANTHONY
Why?

JESSIE
Why not? I like to escape my own bubble too. Put myself in perspective or whatever. Inform myself on these twinkling things we entrust our wishes to.

ANTHONY
That was poetic.

JESSIE
It wasn’t meant to be.

ANTHONY
That makes it even better. (beat) So what do you wish for?

JESSIE
Not telling.

ANTHONY
Because then it won’t come true? That’s baloney.

JESSIE
Because I hardly know you and I’m not just going to spill my wishes to you. (beat) What would you wish for?

ANTHONY
I’m not telling if you don’t.

JESSIE
Whatever. You’re older than me. You’re not supposed to care about that shit.

ANTHONY
Shit?

JESSIE
Yeah?

ANTHONY
I don’t know if you’re old enough to use that word.

JESSIE
Whatever.

ANTHONY
Seriously though. I don’t think your dad would be too pleased if he heard that…

JESSIE
Hey. He really is my dad. Don’t use him on me.

ANTHONY
Alright. Say shit all you want. I don’t care.

JESSIE
Shit. Shit. Shit. So what would you wish for?

ANTHONY
Aside from being able to write this song?

JESSIE
Yes, that’s way too minor.

ANTHONY
Actually, it’s major. C major.

JESSIE
You’re stalling.

ANTHONY
And? I don’t know what I’d wish for. I don’t know if I believe in wishing. Things are the way they are. All you can do is live your life and hope it’s a good one.

JESSIE
That’s so depressing.

ANTHONY
I prefer not to delude myself.

JESSIE
When I wish on the stars, or just hope for things inside my own head or heart or whatever, I’m not deluding myself. I’m just… putting good thoughts into the air and having faith that they won’t disintegrate the second I stop thinking about them. Most of life is just faith anyhow.

ANTHONY
How so?

JESSIE
We don’t know anything, not really, not about ourselves or the world. I mean, how crazy is it that according to astronomers most of these stars are so far away that they don’t even exist anymore? We could never know that for sure, but on some level we have faith in it. And if we can believe that these stars we’re looking at right now are billions of light years away and therefore aren’t even in existence by the time they reach our eyes, it’s not such a far stretch to believe that just maybe those same stars, or, I guess, phantoms of stars, would hear the wishes we tell them and somehow guide them in a direction that might, I don’t know, help them come true.

ANTHONY
Phantoms of stars… that’s so cool. Maybe that’s what we are too… phantoms of people who existed once in some far away dimension and whose energy is still traveling across space and time…

JESSIE
I guess when you think about our ancestors and stuff, we kind of are their phantoms. Except that we’re just as real as they were. At least, I hope so.

ANTHONY
And we’re also pretty different from them, considering evolution and all.

JESSIE
Ooh…what if the stars are our ancestors? Maybe that’s why we wish on them. It’s like asking your great-great-great-great.times.100.or.so-grandmother to help you out.

ANTHONY
That’s a cool idea. I like it.

JESSIE
Me too.

ANTHONY
I guess that means that “we are all made of stars.”

JESSIE
Now that’s a cool idea.

ANTHONY
It’s the title of a Moby song.

JESSIE
Oh. Too bad you didn’t think of it.

ANTHONY
I know. So. Tell me what you wish for.

JESSIE
No.

ANTHONY
That was decisive.

JESSIE
Yep.

ANTHONY
You could just give me a little hint…

JESSIE
Nope.

ANTHONY
(walking to the edge of the roof)
I know what I’d wish for. I’d wish I could fly.

JESSIE
Yeah, that’d be pretty cool. Wouldn’t exactly change the world though.

ANTHONY
You never know. (beat) How fast do you think I’d fall from here to the ground? Two seconds? Three?

JESSIE
I have no idea.

ANTHONY
I take it you’ve never jumped?

JESSIE
Do I look like I’m in a million little pieces?

ANTHONY
It’s not that far.

JESSIE
Far enough to break some bones.

ANTHONY
I’d land in the bushes. They look like a nice cushion.

JESSIE
You’re not really serious are you?

ANTHONY
Are you going to tell me what you wish for or not?

JESSIE
No way are you bribing me.

ANTHONY
Hey! I’d be a shooting star!

JESSIE
Anthony…

ANTHONY
Last chance…

JESSIE
Stop it. I’m not going to--

ANTHONY
--Okay! (he jumps)

JESSIE
ANTHONY!!!!

She runs to the edge and looks over. He is laughing on the ground.

ANTHONY
Oh man. That was great. You should try it.

JESSIE
No freakin way.

ANTHONY
Aw. You’re not mad are you?

JESSIE
Yes. You’re not allowed in my spot anymore.

ANTHONY
Oh come on… you still haven’t told me what you wish for…

JESSIE
And now I’m certainly not going to. Especially because you just ruined one of them.

JESSIE goes back inside and closes the window firmly.

ANTHONY
Really? How? …. Jessie?